Remembering My Husband Peter Filanc

Peter Filanc and the author

Today would have been my beloved husband’s birthday. Pete passed away of invasive bladder cancer May 9, 2007 at the age of 54, just short of his 55th birthday. Way too young for this day and age! But in the time of King Henry VIII, fifty was considered a long life. Life is so interesting isn’t it?! The twists and turns down this marvelous path we call life that we have no idea or prediction of what is going to happen… Or do we? It has been six years since Peter passed away and in that time I have had thoughts and feelings and experiences that have been part of a patchwork quilt that weaves in and out; experiences, thinking, contemplation, horror, retreat and discovery!

I am prostrated with grief one minute, exhilarated in another, and feeling intense physical pain and cannot catch my breath in the third! Pathos gripped me in such a way that I felt I could never break free of its grasp! I felt as if I were being strangled by a boa constrictor!  But the interesting part of the human condition is that with time we can come out through the other side and feel immense joy and love again! My daughter shared a sweet photo of herself and her dad on Facebook today. I had been working in the garden and writing another blog post when I saw her post. It is a lovely memory but also made me sad. Between writing I have been deadheading roses and Pride of Madeira.

Live Oak Tree
California Live Oak on Author/Artist Property

Although Live Oak was one of Peter’s favorite trees, we had never planted one. At the time of Peter’s passing there was a very scrawny little tree that I was tempted to pull out of the landscape but then in surprise realized it was a Live Oak, possibly planted by birds. Live Oak is normally a very slow grower! At times since Peter’s passing I have shown the tree to my girls. Look how this tree has grown!  I walked into the garden yesterday and was amazed that this tree in only six years time has gone from thirty inches to a large healthy tree with a strong trunk over two stories high!

Love you and miss you Peter! You are remembered on your birthday and always!

 Bye for Now,




South Beach
South Beach by Francesca

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